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Katie Westenberg

I Choose Brave

  • Living Brave
  • Brave Faith
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Crossing Generational Lines Bravely: The Gift We’re Missing Out On

by Katie

I am so honored to introduce you all to my sweet friend, Alison, today! Alison was one of my very first friends on this blogging journey. Learning and growing from and with her has been a gift. Her passion and wisdom are honest and real. And she chooses brave. What’s not to love, right? Thank you, Alison, for sharing these beautiful words with us!   -Katie

 

My phone played its tune around 9:00am. I answered, and one of the oldest members of my church asked if I’d like to come help her and her husband in the church gardens.

“Bring a shovel. And wear something lightweight. Oh, and Alison? You should be prepared to drink lots of water.” 

Twenty minutes later I was driving the shovel into dirt, pulling out overgrown weeds and dominating irises. This couple, married nearly 60 years, gathered their gloves and shovels and dug in right next to me.

How do we connect generations? Is it possible? Will it be awkward? What if this fear is causing us to miss out on the incredible gifts we can offer each other?

For hours, we dug – sometimes in complete silence, but more often chatting while sweat rolled down our necks and we gulped down water.

As the sun beat down and our legs were sore from pounding shovels into hard ground, the wife and I took a walk to the roses. I watched her snip the dead buds, pulling off beetles and squishing them between gloved fingers. She told me about how she used to have over 50 rose bushes lining her yard, because her husband worked late and she wanted something to keep her occupied.

Rose pruning was her great art.

She taught me about cutting the sucker branches off of a tomato plant, allowing the main branch to receive more nourishment. “Even when it’s about to bud, you make a decision. And usually the decision is to cut it off.” 

And then there was the story about her childhood victory garden, a place she went to pray because her cousin was captured and left in a Japanese concentration camp. At six years old, she learned to prune and plant, dig and fertilize. At six years old, she carried the vast burden to intercede on behalf of an imprisoned brother.

I refilled my water bottle, drove away from the church, and let her words settle for a while. In less than half a day, I had watched this elderly couple value hard work and the power of a flower-bed to invite people into the church. The husband had shared his greatest marriage wisdom, not because I thought to ask, but because he knew I needed to hear it. His southern accent emphasizing all the right words, he said: just always remember to leave time for talking.

What if I had said no to digging up irises at the church that morning? Choose bravery over fear. Lean in. Listen. Learn.

 

So I keep going back. I leave with a sore back and a full heart.

 

There are a handful of reasons why I could have said no to helping out that first morning. Some of them have to do with work and time-management, sure. But most of them are rooted in some sort of fear. 

Fear that I might not have anything in common with this couple generations ahead of me in age.

Fear that I won’t know what to say in response to their stories.

Fear that our experiences are just a bit too unique to relate.

But sometimes you show up with a shovel and an ice-cold water bottle and you just start digging. You choose bravery over fear. You choose to enter into lives and listen as someone talks about pruning rose bushes, because something wildly simple about that lesson will stick with you forever. 

I was sitting in this woman’s car, cooling off and taking a break from the humidity. She asked about my vision for our church, and about my husband’s vision. I shared pieces of our conversations over the past few months – how we’re passionate about worship, how we have a heart for inviting people into our home, and how we’re praying for some sort of revival to hit our town square in the face and wake up the lost.

She didn’t say anything at first. She just listened and nodded and wiped her dripping brow.

But as I got out of the car to continue digging, she caught my arm. “Thanks for giving me hope.”

She must have seen my puzzled look – me giving her hope? She continued, “There is nothing more exciting for an old person like me than seeing a young person like you get excited about church. You’ve given me hope.”

…

Fear gets in the way of too much these days, and this may be one of the most destructive sacrifices we’re making: forgoing time with those older, or younger, than we are. We all have something to offer, beautiful life experiences and stories and wisdom. Victory gardens and marriage advice and tomato-pruning skills. 

Hebrews 13:7 reminds us to “Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith.” And then in verse 8: “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” (ESV)

Those verses seem misplaced when read in unison, but there are no misplaced words in Scripture. And that means that Jesus remaining the same, influences our decision to remember our leaders. Christ’s sameness guarantees that this older couple served, and continues the serve, the same God I serve. The wife prayed to the same God in her victory garden. The husband worshipped the same God in his farm fields.

This makes their wisdom, teaching, and stories more powerful than we give credit.

What Jesus has done for them He continues to do for me. His faithfulness rests on a solid foundation of sameness, and so their stories testify to Him in a way I have yet to experience – but need to understand deep in my soul.    

Let us never forgo the giving of our time for something this special. It is worth dirt under our fingernails and throbbing muscles. It is worth our sacrifice and the possibility of awkward.

This opportunity, saying yes to these moments, is the sweetest kind of brave.

***

Alison Tiemeyer has a passion for stories, grace, and settling into stillness. She is a wife, writer, reader, and excited learner. But at her core is a fierce love for Jesus. She writes to make His story shine brighter. You can find her at www.alisontiemeyer.com or on Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest.

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Filed Under: Living Brave

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Margaret says

    August 18, 2017 at 5:28 am

    Yes, yes, put on those gloves and just listen..how I love learning from those older than I!

    • Katie says

      August 18, 2017 at 7:40 am

      I feel like I’m treasuring that more and more, Margaret. Like the older again, the more I realize how much I don’t know!

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Katie Westenberg

Hey, friend, I’m glad you’re here! I’m Katie. One girl determined to do life bravely. One girl determined to Fear God and Live Brave, to parent well, live authentically and work hard for all the things that matter. I Choose Brave and I hope you will too!

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This is fun news! For a limited time, buy a copy o This is fun news! For a limited time, buy a copy of But Then She Remembered for MOM and we’ll send YOU a copy of the audiobook for free!

Distraction is a multi-generational struggle. Remembering is a multi-generational command. Let’s do this, together. Here are the details:

Purchase your copy of But Then She Remembered from any retailer and then head to my website (link in bio) to get your free copy of the audiobook. It’s that simple.
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Available while supplies last. (Note: the offer says buy a copy for mom, not necessarily YOUR mom. Buy a copy for a woman who is a mom, or a woman who has a mom. 😊 They all qualify. Just grab it before they’re gone!}
I scanned a post shared by a friend awhile back an I scanned a post shared by a friend awhile back and the words quickly wooed me. I’ve long been a sucker for words.
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The writer spun them expertly, thoughtfully, vividly, and I was glad to drink of her craft, greedy for story drawn artfully, delivered thoughtfully, from a deep well.

Until I realized, the words weren’t true. The author was believing a well woven lie and carefully threading mistruth into her own kind of gospel. Her mastery, a thin veil for mistruth.
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I was reminded, friend, perhaps the apple looks a bit different today. The shape and size, delivery method, have gone modern but the Truth is still the same - sin is crouching, desiring us and we are commanded to rule over it. Still, today.
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We must know Truth to spot lies. We must remember it, to recognize the difference. We must be aware of our weaknesses and the sticky compulsion of temptation. It’s our responsibility to rule here. May we do so, bravely..
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{Genesis 4:7 
And more like this in the newly released, But Then She Remembered.}
This morning, remember. This morning, remember.
Just a little PSA to remind you - it’s possible. Just a little PSA to remind you - it’s possible. 

It’s possible to be aware of the news and the world, of foreign relations and politics, and not be obsessed about it.

It’s possible to feel the real hurt of real trouble and not be possessed by it.

It’s possible to be in the world and not of it. To remember who God was, and is, and always will be, above it.

It’s possible to remember Him here.

May we learn to do so, bravely.
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{Beautifully modeled in Psalm 77. See for yourself, friend.❤️}
Slow processor over here. But this little book lau Slow processor over here. But this little book launched into the world on Tuesday and I’m still reeling from the beauty of celebrating side by side with so many sisters, the grace of what it looks like when so many women offer their gifts for His glory (fishes and loaves never looked so good!), and the incredible support of my local community. I’ll never forget it.
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If you want to join us as women determined to remember the goodness of God in this wildly distracting world, grab yourself a copy of the book and LET’S GO! We are ready for it.❤️
HOW SWEET IS THIS? My dear friend @jodie_berndt an HOW SWEET IS THIS? My dear friend @jodie_berndt and I get to release books on the very same day - tomorrow! To celebrate @growthrootsco (another dear friend and creator of the loveliest journals) is giving YOU a chance to win copies of them all!

Here’s the offering:

1. My book - But then she remembered (how to give God your full attention in a distracted world)
2. Jodie’s book - Praying the scriptures for your marriage (trusting God with your most important relationship)
3. A growth book! 
4. Jodie’s favorite pens!
5. An Amazon gift card!! 
6. Marriage conversation cards! 

Beautiful, right? I know these women, their love for Jesus, their work and their words. You will LOVE these books, friend (and the extra goodies too). 

Here’s how to enter:

1. Follow @jodie_berndt, @katie_westenberg and @growthrootsco

2. Tag 3 friends (or more 😉 each tag or share gives you another entry) 

3. Like this post.

That’s it! The giveaway will close Wednesday night and the winner will be announced Thursday! 

*Giveaway open to U.S residents only. As per Instagram’s rules, this promotion is not sponsored, administered, or associated with Instagram in any way.*
The humanity of Jesus Christ is an indispensable g The humanity of Jesus Christ is an indispensable gift to us as believers. Every challenge we face He met and mastered. The Bible doesn’t speak of endless notifications and group texts, but it does speak of people with real needs showing up in Christ’s path constantly. 
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Wherever He went crowds followed with needs and questions and frustrations and problems. He got in a boat to cross to the other side of the sea, and people would race to meet Him there. 

Can you even imagine?

And His most common response? He was moved with compassion. 
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Over and over again, He stopped what He was doing, paused from the task at hand, and tended to the needy hearts - the bleeding woman, the woman at the well - right in front of Him.
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Far too often I find I’m happy to entertain distractions - anything that prevents me from giving my full attention to something else - and yet annoyed by interruptions. Perhaps it is because one I choose, while the other I do not?
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Discerning the difference between a distraction and an interruption has been a helpful tool to me. I want to love like Christ. I want to be interruptible, but I want to give my full attention to what He places in my path.
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What about you? Are you more frustrated by distractions or interruptions?
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{excerpt from But Then She Remembered: How to Give God Your Full Attention in a Distracted World.}
UPDATE: You all scooped up dozens of copies in min UPDATE: You all scooped up dozens of copies in minutes! 🎉 Well done! You know how to love your leaders well. I wish we had another case of books to give away! We are closing this giveaway for now. If you sent us a message watch for a reply soon!
****

I need your help with something fun! 
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This little book is making its way out into the world and instead of sending all of the marketing copies to all of the “influencer” people, we’ve held a supply back for the real people on the ground. 
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These copies are for the women’s ministry leaders and the Bible study leaders. The small group leaders and women out there mentoring and serving others in quiet and unseen places. The women without a platform or audience in the world’s currency, but willing to do good and important work for the women right in front of them.
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I’m convinced this work of leading and serving face to face is more important than ever and I want to say thank you! And keep going! Your work matters.
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So here is how it works: If you are a local leader or know of one who you would like me to send a copy of my hot-off-the-press book, But Then She Remembered: How to Give God Your Full Attention in a Distracted World, DM me with a name and mailing address. I’ll send them a copy of the book with a personal thank you note for the good work they are doing.
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Crash my inbox. We’ll send ‘em out while supplies last!

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