How to Thrive in the Changing Seasons

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My head hit the pillow and I felt my entire body sigh in relief.

You’ve felt that, right?  The full body sigh. Whole body tired.

I exhaled my thoughts to the man beside me, my forever partner in this parenting journey.  “Am I just imagining it or is this stage of life even more exhausting than when the kids were all toddlers, even more tiring than when we had two kids in diapers?”

“Possibly”, he answers.

And then with gentle honesty he reminds me that:

1. I am getting older.  (How good of him to notice, right?  Clearly he’s choosing brave in this moment, but I’m too tired to even offer a snarky reply.  Plus, he’s right. Darn.)
2. The kids are pretty active and involved, so this stage of life has brought on a lot more running. Which, yes, is tiring.

As I mull over his observations I realize comparing exhaustion at the various stages of life – sleepless nights or longer days, babes or tots or teens – is fruitless.  It’s all tiring.  I’m beginning to learn, in all sorts of ways, it always feels like a lot.

 

But I’m a Best Yes girl.  (one of my favorites, friends.)  I’m supposed to be choosing my best yes so all the things fit together quite nicely.  I shouldn’t be overwhelmed.  So where did I go wrong?  Where did I mess up?  I thought all these yeses were good ones.

And so this is where I have found myself in the past few weeks, friends, wondering where exactly I went wrong.

I thought the new all day co-op, which would take us away from home for a full day each week, would be a great choice for our family.  And it is.  It’s fitting the bill perfectly.

I thought soccer was a good activity for our children.  And it is.  Three out of four kids are on the same field at the same time.  It’s one practice and one game a week for 6 weeks. It is good.

I thought I felt the calling to lead my first ever Bible Study (First ever. For reals!) and I’m seeing His fingerprints all over the preparations for it.  It is good.

In planning for this season I cut some activities from the schedule.  I stepped down from some responsibilities and declined some writing opportunities.  I prayed about it all and felt like they were all good decisions.  And yet, my life is busy.  So I’ve been wracking my brain, wondering, where did I go wrong?

 

Last week a friend of mine sent me a devotion – a friend I don’t talk to daily, not even weekly much of the time.  She had no idea where my heart has been, she just casually forwarded a devotion she liked and thought I might appreciate it as well.

And it was my answer.

Don’t you love it when God works like that?  Don’t you love it when friends are simply obedient?  A causal offering,  a two-second yes to the smallest nudging when they have no clue how they are being used by Him.  Sometimes we think God only works in thundershowers and grand displays, but so often it looks like a friend passing along something they thought was nice, something they appreciated, but something that ended up being solid gold to the ears that needed to hear it.

We really have no clue how our words, how sharing truth can be soul-filling and life-giving.  Might I urge you?  If you have the inclination, share the words.  Speak them.  Forward them.  Hit share or send.  Text or make the phone call.  Words are life-giving in ways we don’t even know.  Be His conduit.  Say the words.

Anyhow, I digress.

So the words she forwarded that day was a devotion based on Ecclesiastes 3.  A time for everything.  A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to pluck what is planted… you’ve heard these words before.  I’ve heard these words.  But on that morning, they were my answer.

As I sat in the dark and early quiet, my Bible and coffee beside me, I heard Him.  I am here.  In all of it, I am here.

How had I not even noticed?  

It is good.  He is here.

When we’re called to changing seasons there is no guarantee it will be fun and games, that it will be full of rest or leisure.  We aren’t promised that.  Just ask someone in a season of grief or a season of waiting.  Ask a friend in a season of war or loss or letting go or saying good bye.  It’s hard.  Heart-breaking hard.  Gut-wrenching hard.  Full body tired and hard.

But our job is to focus less on the season and more on the Savior.

 

I feel like busy has become a red-flag word in our world right now.  We see how our lives have easily become over-scheduled, how our kids have become over-stimulated, how our families have become over-committed and so we fight hard to swing the other way, to stop the glorification of busy, to find rest and unplug and connect.

And I get it.  They have and we do.  Yes, to all of that.

Yet somewhere along the line, in the pursuit of that worthy cause, I have started throwing out mental flares and caution signs at the first site of busyness.  I started developing the slightest fear of busy, a fear of activity, a fear of too much.

But that is not what God has called us to either.  He has called us to follow Him.

He hasn’t called me to follow the latest book or method or blog post for parenting well – the more busy or less busy strategy.  He has called me to follow Him.

He hasn’t called me to fear that we aren’t having enough family dinners around the table or if those dinners are healthy enough (hot dogs, anyone?).  He has called me to follow Him.

He hasn’t called me to worry about how involved we are or how much we are serving or giving or loving compared to the next person.  He has called me to seek and to listen and to follow Him.

And you know what?  He is here.  He is sustaining me.  Yes, it looks like busy.  Yes, I go to bed tired at night.  But He is giving me rest in those quiet mornings, energy for those long afternoons and patience to walk this road in a season that is busy.  Somehow I had become so fixated upon the season that I barely noticed the Savior.

I’m not that different than Peter stepping out of the boat and into the water, friends.  Jesus said “come” and Peter stepped.  But then he saw the waves, I saw the busy, and we both lost our nerve.  Yet there was never anything there to fear.  He was there all along.  Why do we doubt?

Don’t fear the changing seasons, friends.  Don’t even fear the busy.  Don’t fear the hard or the long, the hurt or the brokenness.  There are seasons in which we are called to roll up our sleeves and get to work, seasons of hard tears, of leaning in or waiting with patience that feels painful.  And it’s tiring.  But it’s a season and He is there.  Stay focused and see Him in all of it.

I’m fighting for focus right along with you.